The next morning, the groups are all hard at work figuring out their outfits and polishing their choreographies. Louise, however, is facing an internal dilemma that makes her very anxious.
Louise: I know that I said I wouldn’t sacrifice my opinions while being here, and I know how this will sound to my friends, but… I need a makeover, I want to look more feminine. I’ve been wearing this outfit for years, and I just don’t know how to branch out and try something new.
Kyungri: Oh honey, you’re a young woman in control of your image. You can choose to look like anything you want, and no one can say anything about it. If you want a makeover, you are getting one right now, so get ready! This couldn’t happen at a better moment. You need some mascara… your hair is crunchy… girl, stop squirming….
Louise: I’m… speechless. I look so beautiful!
Kyungri: Girl, you can thank me later. We have a challenge to win!
Kyungri: And so now that we’re all as hot as we can be, I propose that we really show that off with skimpy costumes. Sex sells, remember, and that’s what the judges want! And with this song…
Gabriel: I agree. We’re the hottest team here, we have to show that!
Louise: You know, usually I would have been outraged at that idea, but now that Kyungri’s worked her magic on me, I can’t wait to see myself transformed into a sexy vixen. But only this one time!
Gabriel: Speaking of that… Louise, you look beautiful!
Louise: Uh, thanks Gabriel… that’s sweet!
Matthieu: *is thinking about the previous night…*
Louise: I still can’t believe how different I look. How GOOD I look. I was always opposed to this kind of look, but I just can’t help but loving it now that I see it. Who would have thought that some lashes and some makeup, plus a simple but trendy outfit would make all the difference? I’m rather terrified about the outfits Kyungri has planned, but also oddly excited… and did you hear Gabriel complimenting me? That was exciting.
The third group is also in the midst of preparing their outfits.
Marjan: It’s a beachy, tropical-sounding song, so why not go with casual and breezy outfits? All bright and cheerful, like what I’m wearing right now?
Enca: I… kind of like it. I usually go for much more revealing and flowy outfits, but I like this laid-back idea. My peach can take a break from the exposure.
Todd: Um, no it can’t. Your peach is the only one that can really dance here…
Todd: I just let the girls take charge… I know that I’ll look good in anything, and I’ll shine in the solo section after all. Have you seen me?
Hottie: I told you girls this was a good idea! A competition for the money and prestige, don’t you wish we were in here? We would win all that money!
Red Oyster: Oh girl, quit dreaming. We’re judging contestants on a reality competition, that’s better than being in one. You couldn’t move your fat ass in choreography, anyway!
Sweetie: If your dancing is as good as your cooking, at least we know you’d put on a damn show: we’d all be on the ground, rolling and gasping for air while you show off more of that unique Hottie-brand delusion.~
ajmkv: Let’s welcome to the stage our three groups!
ajmkv: Daaaaaaamn, everyone, y’all look like completely different people!
Sweetie: This reminds of that time on Flavor of Love when I went from being an innocent girl who doesn’t kiss on the first date to a slutacious mama. The transformation is real!
Hottie: But who looks the most expensive here? I’m on their side.
Red Oyster: The team wearing red is the winner. The competition is over!
Jessie: I couldn’t believe my eyes when I saw some of these people… is that really LOUISE looking like a stripper? I knew Kyungri was convincing, but damn! She also looks like a million bucks… if the million bucks were in singles, hanging out of her skimpy outfit while she works the pole. She looks fabulous!
ajmkv: Our first team consists of Charlee, Jessie, Harrison, and Mitchell. Let’s take a look at their promotional shots.
And now, they will be performing “You Got It”, by the good sis Karmen.
ajmkv: And now, for their solos.
Harrison: Honestly I think I did really well! I felt comfortable, I was having fun, I looked hot… everything was working in my favor! The other teams better watch out, our team really worked it and came through. Hats off to Charlee, she did an excellent job with the outfits! She looked great, too. Everyone on our team did! We killed this challenge!
Charlee: *voiceover* Honestly, I don’t know what I expected from this challenge, but god damn did we pull it off. I look like the fiercest vampire slayer biker bitch in the world, and I am killing this song with my punchy moves and attitude. I think I have this challenge in the bag. My team did a surprisingly good job, too… under my strong command, of course.
Jessie: *voiceover* I fully expected this challenge to be a complete mess, but on that stage, dressed head to toe in the most uncomfortable but beautiful clothing, dancing to that club banger, I felt like the baddest chick in the world. I don’t know how we did it, but we did it… I have to give props where they’re due, and honestly Charlee did a great job. We might have had some… issues, but I’m not one to hold on to grudges. She was a good leader.
Mitchell: That outfit was so not me, but hey, we looked good! I’m not the best dancer, but I did my best. To be quite honest, I wasn’t really thinking that much about the challenge… too much happened last night for me to really think that much about what’s going on now. I just hope Marjan is admiring me in the audience.
Red Oyster: Now THAT was quite the performance. Wow! Charlee, babe, you really sold the performance, and I am LOVING your red hair!
Sweetie: I completely agree! The looks fit the feel of the song really well, I felt like I was at an underground club watching hot bikers in a fight club… but instead of fighting, they were dancing. And looking absolutely hot. Harrison, you’re so hot!
Red Oyster: Oh, definitely! Jessie, you also really sold that look. I ADORE that top and those flowers, and you made your dancing look effortless. You’re definitely one to watch.
Hottie: I really appreciated how much effort was put into this, it really worked as a performance. I was surprised no one tried to sabotage anyone here! However, Mitchell, I feel like you weren’t completely into the performance… am I right?
Sweetie: Totally. In a group full of hits, you were the only miss, even though it was a very slight miss. Your dancing just wasn’t as inspired as the rest. You needed a little bit more!
Hottie: Charlee, you were great, but Jessie was my favorite. Harrison, I don’t think you really stood out in your solo, though you looked hot in that red hair.
Red Oyster: Are you kidding me? Charlee was the absolute best.
Harrison: 6 from Hottie, 8 from Sweetie, 8.5 from Red Oyster.
Charlee: 8.5 from Hottie, 10 from Sweetie, 10 from Red Oyster.
Jessie: 10 from Hottie, 8 from Sweetie, 10 from Red Oyster.
Mitchell: 8 from Hottie, 7 from Sweetie, 5 from Red Oyster.
ajmkv: Our second team consists of Kyungri, Louise, Gabriel, and Matthieu. Let’s take a look at their promotional pictures.
And now, they will be performing “Chocolata”, by Seya Loca.
ajmkv: And now for the solos.
Gabriel: *voiceover* I really enjoyed myself in this challenge! We worked really great as a team, everyone was really into it and put in a lot of effort, and we looked so hot! Kudos to Kyungri for basically putting everything together, from the looks to the choreo, everything was conceived under her watchful eye and it was such a success! I wonder what she’s done in her past to be so good at all this… I mean, did you see what she did to Louise? She transformed her into a different person!…
Matthieu: *voiceover* I really wanted to look my best in this challenge, so I pulled out my lightsticks and put on a show! Kyungri and I had worked a bit on that, so it was nice to surprise the audience. Everyone on our team looked amazing, especially the girls, who looked like they were the most expensive of strippers—I say this as a compliment! To be honest, I was hoping a certain someone in the audience was impressed with my performance, so I put in 110%…
Harrison: Did you see how GORGEOUS Matthieu looked? It was so hard for me to stay in my seat while watching him. I just wanted to jump onto that stage and have him move like that all over me!… *proceeds to blush furiously* Did I just say that?
Charlee: This team is doing surprisingly well… but hey, their concept was “strippers n’ bros”, and I’m sure that Kyungri knows all about that scene…
Kyungri: *voiceover* Yeah, so maybe there’s more to me than meets the eye. Let’s just say this isn’t my first time at the rodeo… how do you think I got all these skills? How do you think I got my family out of the streets and into a beautiful home? Honey, this beautiful body wasn’t made for a man—it was made for many, and they sure did love looking at it. I’m not ashamed of it; on the contrary, have you seen how I can move? Anyway, our team did great, and if anyone else wins this challenge I’ll be so upset. We all looked perfect, I looked perfect, and victory is ours for the taking. I’m showing every bit of Dr. Kim’s handiwork, and it’s going to bring us the crown. I feel great!
Louise: *voiceover* I never thought that I, Louise Meunier, would be dancing on a stage in front of an audience of millions, wearing the skimpiest outfit in the world, shaking around to the sluttiest song in the world, but here I am, and I. Am. Loving. It. I don’t know how this happened, but I am having the time of my life. I don’t even care if we win, because this was so much fun. I am so grateful to my team members, we really did work great together. And damn, I can’t stop looking at myself… I look cheap and I LOVE IT.
Hottie: Oh. My. God. Those men were no joke, I am sitting over here salivating and thinking, Flav Who? I would like a bite of that Chocolata!
Sweetie: Honey, when they’re dancing to that song, they are dedicating it to the true Chocolata: me.
Red Oyster: You can lust over the men all you want, but honestly I was more into the girls. Both of them can tie me up and charge double, triple if they want. This was the performance I came here to see!
Sweetie: I agree, Kyungri was super hot! Did you see those moves? She has to have done this before!
Red Oyster: And can we just talk about how different Louise looked? She didn’t look aaaaanything like this yesterday, what happened? Whatever went on that brought about this change, I approve of it. Girl looks fantastic!
Hottie: I literally have nothing to say. I’m giving everyone 10s. 10s for everyone!
Sweetie: I mean, I agree, but I feel like Gabriel could have pushed a little bit more. I wanted more sexy daddy from him!
Red Oyster: Yes, more Magic Mike from him would have been nice… but other than that, I can’t find a single flaw. I am still shook over Louise’s transformation into this sexy minx that we see in front of us.
Matthieu: 10 from Hottie, 10 from Sweetie, 10 from Red Oyster.
Louise: 10 from Hottie, 10 from Sweetie, 10 from Red Oyster.
Kyungri: 10 from Hottie, 10 from Sweetie, 10 from Red Oyster.
Gabriel: 10 from Hottie, 9 from Sweetie, 8.5 from Red Oyster.
ajmkv: Last but not least, we have our third group: Enca, Marjan, Todd, and Enzo. Let’s look at their promo shots.
They will be performing to “Amor”, by Kamelia.
Oooh, but what’s happening in the audience? It seems like a certain budding couple is enjoying sitting next to each other a little too much…
Harrison: You were so gorgeous up there, you know… I couldn’t keep my eyes off you! You’re the winner for me.~
Matthieu: You’re telling me! Your red hair is stunning on you, you look so handsome and I can’t stop looking at you…
Harrison: *blushes a deeper red than even his hair*
Matthieu: I like this all red look on you!
Jessie: Guys, shut up and just watch the performance! *rolls eyes*
ajmkv: And now, for the solos.
Enca: *voiceover* I’m not sure what’s going on, I’m not really feeling this performance. I’m not used to doing a lot of choreography, I usually just sway my long hair and everyone else does the slutty splits and drops around me. It’s weird being completely alone on this stage and performing a song that isn’t mine… I need to get out of my head and move this peach, but it’s not flowing naturally… maybe if this song was a 20 second clip of Ciao, then I’d be able to move, buoyed by the thirst of my fans…
Marjan: *voiceover* The lights were fun, and I looked cute, and that’s all that matters! Plus, I was more busy thinking about my teddy bear…
Enca: Marjan’s not much of a dancer, either, is she? Maybe I’ll be safe, after all! Sorry girl!
Enzo: *voiceover* Selling a fantasy is my thing, so I’m going to sell the sh*t out of this outfit and this song. My team didn’t work that well, honestly only Todd and I did well, so I’m hoping that the girls don’t take us down with them. I put in a big effort and I know I look good, so I hope the judges appreciate that.
Todd: *voiceover* At this point, I’m hoping that Enzo and I can keep this team afloat. I don’t think we stand a chance at winning, but I’m hoping we can be judged individually, so I’m going to turn on the charm and dance like my life depends on it. Let’s hope it works out…
Hottie: That whole performance was… interesting.
Sweetie: Interesting? The girls looked like they were dying or something when the song deserved much, much better.
Red Oyster: Yeah, the boys did well during the whole thing, but sadly they were outshined by the girls’ inadequacy.
Sweetie: That’s a f*cking joke.
Hottie: *bicycle bell noise as she blinks*
Red Oyster: Yeah…
Sweetie: And isn’t one of them supposed to be a big popstar or something? THAT’S a f*cking joke.
Enca: 5 from Enca, 6 from Sweetie, 3.5 from Red Oyster.
Todd: 7 from Hottie, 9 from Sweetie, 8 from Red Oyster.
Enzo: 8 from Hottie, 7.5 from Sweetie, 9 from Red Oyster.
Marjan: 4 from Hottie, 3 from Sweetie, 5 from Red Oyster.
ajmkv: Now that the performances are done and dusted, y’all can go get some rest. Congratulations on an incredible show! Thank you to our amazing judges for helping out. All right, people, make sure to be ready for nominations tomorrow! Your scores from the judges will be put together with the nomination tallies to obtain our call-out order for the week. Sleep tight, y’all!