“The Girl Who Judges Everyone” (Part I)

Season 2: Episode 9

Previously, on K&GI: The contestants were sent to a beautiful tropical resort for the next part of the competition. Everyone immediately fell in love with the location and spirits were at a record high, with everyone getting along with each other. This didn’t last long, however, since the challenge brought out the competitive sides of the housemates. Each contestant, paired up and working with a special guest, had to navigate the resort jungle without a map, and this proved to be a bigger challenge than anticipated. Jessie and especially Louise seemed to hit it off with their respective partners, while Matthieu was jealous of how well Harrison got along with his partner. Marjan’s guest seemed to know more than she let on and she caused Marjan to break her façade, showing a dark side that was immediately noticeable to everyone looking at her. Gabriel, Kyungri, and Matthieu all had problems communicating with their partners, but in the end it was Enzo, replacing Gabriel and placed in the bottom by Marjan, who ended up going home despite the fact he did well. Seven contestants remain; who will be sent packing next?

It’s a new day in the K&GI tropical villa, and the housemates are taking their time getting around. Everyone is shocked that Enzo was eliminated, since it was his very first time in the bottom. Matthieu and Jessie are both feeling the pressure, since they feel like they’re up against big competition.

Jessie: I don’t know, really. When I was on that other reality show, Life Is A Game, I reached Top 3! I was really popular with the viewers before I was beat by those two guys who were dating each other…

Matthieu: That sounds completely shocking and original, wow. Unheard of! A gay couple reached the Top 2? Who knew a gay couple would be the fan favorites!

Jessie: You’re kidding, right?

Matthieu: Why?

Jessie: …All right. No, but really! I don’t know why I’m not feeling as confident this time around, I have to do a little bit more to make sure that I’m not sent home next.

Matthieu: You and I both! Though I’m sure we’ll both make it for a few more episodes, I can feel it.

Jessie: I’m sure he’s right, we’ve both survived eliminations and both had first call-outs, but I’m still going to put in a lot of effort this week. I don’t want to go home yet! I guess I thought that I’d be going very far because of the last reality show I was in, but Kev & Get It has been so, so much harder than that other flop show…

Later on in the day, after everyone has woken up and feels refreshed, ajmkv drops by for a surprise announcement. The seven remaining housemates all gather in the patio.

ajmkv: Yo, what’s up everyone? I bet you’re surprised I’m here, no? Me, showing up in person twice in a row? It must be a miracle! No more photoshopped host, it’s all me up in here from now on. I hope you’re feeling rested, because I know for a fact that you’re not going to love the news I’m about to give you…

ajmkv: So, think about it… you all came here to compete, to win the prize: millions of eyes on you, lots of money in your pocket, the recognition of your peers, and the sweet, sweet taste of victory and success! You’ve knocked out half of the cast already, and are getting very close to the end, but… what about the people you’ve sent home? How do you think they feel? 

Kyungri: *under her breath* Who cares?

ajmkv: It’s unfortunate that people have to leave without getting a second chance for a shot at all of those beautiful things, isn’t it? Don’t you just want to give them all another opportunity?

Louise: *whispers* Hell no!

Harrison: *voiceover* What is ajmkv even talking about? I swear, that man is going to pull a new stunt and mess everything up. And just when I was doing so well, too! He’s probably going to have all the eliminated contestants judge the next challenge or something…

ajmkv: Now, now, everyone, you can’t just sit pretty and simply rest on your successes so far, can you? On your way to the top, you’ve managed to ruin other people’s dreams and hurt a lot of feelings, and I think… that… honestly… it’s only fair to give the eliminated a contestants another chance, don’t you? *everyone gasps* What do you think? Do you want to give all the people who have gone home another chance? Don’t you think they deserve it?

Marjan: Oh, you cheeky sneaky sausage! That’s a terrible idea!

Louise: Why on earth do you think that would be a good thing to do?

ajmkv: No, really! I think it’s only fair to let everyone come back for another chance to shine. *under his breath* Plus, with this recent increase in budget and filming quality, it would be lovely to give everyone the chance to look smooth and beautiful, not pixelated and rough… *coughs* Anyway, yes. I’ve made up my mind! I’m going to bring all the eliminated contestants back right away to be a part of the next challenge!

Matthieu: *voiceover* I’m shocked. I don’t think this is a good idea at all. Some of the people that have gone home weren’t happy to leave…

Harrison: *voiceover* I’m shook. I thought that they’d only come back to be guests, but they’re going to compete with us? Charlee is going to be back? Who thought that was a clever idea?

Gabriel: *voiceover* I’m roaring with laughter, honestly. This show knows exactly how to push our buttons, and there is NO way that this new challenge is going to be anything BUT dramatic. I’m not against it, though, because it’s going to be hilarious to see what will happen, I know the fights will be interesting. To say the least!

ajmkv: Now, I see you’re all shocked at this news, but we mustn’t wait a single moment. It’s time to come say hello to your beloved housemates who have previously gone home. Come, let’s welcome them all!

The eliminated housemates all walk toward the villa, some smiling on their way up, others looking serious. The non-eliminated housemates have a mixture of shock, dismay, distaste, and amusement on their faces. The eliminees line up, and stand there, looking at the other contestants in defiance.

ajmkv: You all remember our lovely housemates! Patricio, the Latin papi with a taste for the ladies; Enca, the juicy popstar with more than a couple tricks under her shirt… I mean, sleeves; Mitchell, the shy but charming funny man; Charlee, the confident and determined drama queen; Enzo, the dashing model with the hunger to prove himself; China, the beautiful and shrewd lawyer with a heart of gold; and Todd, the sassy pot-stirrer that won’t stop at anything to make himself heard. Let’s give them all a hand, everyone!

None of the contestants make a noise. They stand there, lined up in the patio, staring at the other people with stony expressions on their faces.

Marjan: *voiceover* I’m actually happy to see some of these people, but gosh! You can feel the tension in the group, it’s like a thick blanket of syrup over us, the sweet waffles. Yes, exactly like that! We’ve made it out of the oven only to be put on a plate and smothered in syrup. It’s uncanny!

Charlee: Heeeeeeeeey bitches! I bet you thought you’d seen the very last of me in this competition, but guess what: I’m back! I can see everyone’s faces and I am adoring this. I mean, the Plastic Princess is looking at me like she’s trying to look angry, but she can’t really move her face. Ha! I’m staring back just as hard because, honey, there is NO way I’m not going to take advantage of every opportunity to get back at the others and come back into the competition.

Kyungri: *voiceover* Omona. This is just another silly little obstacle on the path toward the money. I’m strong and determined enough to win all of this, but honestly, who wants to deal with all of these basic eliminees? Repeat with me: E-L-I-M-I-N-E-E-S. They were sent home! And not just by us, but by the FANS. No one in that group stands a chance against me, even IF they manage to make it back into the competition…

ajmkv: I’m going to go to my villa now, since I can tell that a few of you want to tear my head off… but before I leave, let me tell you about the challenge: you’re going to participate in the K&GI roast, where you will be teasing and making fun of your housemates, the producers, and the fans… all in good fun, of course! You’ll be competing against each other, so make sure to prepare some good digs or you may be knocked out. For the comeback competitors: you’ll be fighting against each other for a place in the final round of the roast, and if you do well, you may just come back. It’s not for sure that one of you will, so make sure to impress and you might take someone’s spot! Also, tonight y’all will be enjoying cocktails together at a little party. Make sure to catch up, and play nice! With that said, I’m going to go before y’all kill me, byeeeeee.

***

That evening, after the comeback contestants settle into the villa, everyone gathers on the deck to have dinner and cocktails. The mood is electric, with many a sly look and snide comment being thrown around. Each housemate chooses a seat at the table.

China: The moist cupcake is back, baby! I went home for a little bit and tackled some good cases, but as soon as I got the opportunity to come back, I snapped it up. There’s nothing like being watched by a huge audience when you’re slaying, and a TV show is the best way to experience this! Now, I know I was terrible in my last episode here, who would have thought? But, you all should know: I’m back and I’m going to stay here. *laughs* Anyway, that cocktail party was… hilarious. The looks people were giving each other! But me, I was just happy to see Gabriel again, and he sure was happy to see me, too…

China: You’re looking fine, aren’t you? How has the house been without me?

Gabriel: It hasn’t been the same, that’s for sure!

China: Well, baby, I hope you’re ready because you’ll be seeing a lot more of me.

Gabriel: And boy, do I want to see much, much more of you…

China: There there, boy, be good! If you behave, you may get a treat!

Jessie: *voiceover* I’m looking over to see how Lou is feeling about China being back, and I’m not liking what I’m seeing. Lou looks like she could murder China but isn’t saying anything at all, and Gabriel is just as clueless as always. It’s not fun!

On the other side of the table, a more joyous reunion is taking place. Harrison is thrilled to see Enca, and now that they’re finally seated next to each other he gushes about how happy he is that she’s back.

Harrison: Do you think you’ll be able to come back? I’ve missed you so much!

Enca: Boy, you’ll see! I have more than one trick up my sleeve. Either way, I’ve missed you too! I was sad to say goodbye to you, but I just had to get out of there when I did.

Harrison: I really do hope you can come back! Hopefully now that there are less of us, maybe you can feel more comfortable?

Enca: As I said, we’ll see… I’m sure you’ll be surprised, in any case…

Harrison: OK, fingers crossed! But hey, how do you feel about Patricio being here, too? I know you two didn’t really end on a good note.

Enca: We’ll talk more about that later, but for now: honestly, it’s not too bad to see him. I feel like time and distance have helped me a little…

On his way to his seat, Patricio overhears this and smiles, but doesn’t say anything and continues to walk. He sits down and is immediately sucked into a conversation with Charlee, who already seems to be throwing shade. Nearby, Enzo and Jessie are discussing his elimination, trying to avoid catching Charlee’s eye because they know that she’s looking for trouble.

Enzo: So, really, it’s OK. Sure, I’m mad but I’m still here and ready to fight for a spot!

Jessie: I never expected any less from you. I know you’re probably pissed at Marjan for what she did.

Enzo: Sure, I’m angry at her but it was either going to be me or someone else. I like to think that she chose me because she knows I’m competition! I really don’t know why else she would choose me.

Jessie: I don’t know with that one. I feel like we don’t know absolutely anything about her, and it’s a little unsettling. We’ve lived with her for how many weeks?

Enzo: She’s an interesting case, that’s for sure. I wonder if we’re ever going to find anything out…

And while they’re talking about her, Marjan is on the other side of the table, sending shy looks in Mitchell’s direction. The two ended on an awkward note, and Mitchell is unsure of how to approach the subject with her, since he still feels very attracted to her.

Marjan: I… I’m happy to see you!

Mitchell: Listen, I know you’ve probably moved on because you’ve had to, but I wanted to let you know that I’ve been thinking a lot about you…

Marjan: Aww, that’s so sweet! I… I’ve been… thinking about you too… sometimes…

Mitchell: It’s OK if you aren’t! I know you’re probably busy with the whole show and everything…

Marjan: I have a lot on my mind, yeah. I’m like… an overloaded washing machine and I don’t know how I’m going to take another load of laundry without exploding in a flurry of shiny bubbles and fragrant sprays of water…

Mitchell: Er… yeah. I totally get it.

Mitchell: She seems… distant? Like, everything is there, she looks just as beautiful and wonderful as ever, but her spark is missing? I don’t know how to explain it, but there’s something behind her eyes that tells me that there’s something going on, and I’d really like to help her. But… she doesn’t seem to want to let me in, and I’m not about to be pushy or anything… *sighs* I’m just hoping she still feels like she can open up to me!

~•~•~•~•~

Tune into Part II here!